Using Emotions For Personal Growth

I have been on a journey for many years, exploring my spiritual nature and growing emotionally and mentally as a result.  It hasn’t been easy.  However, once I figured out that, I was here to learn, my challenges and opportunities became my classroom.  Using emotions for personal growth is one of the most powerful ways of learning I have encountered.  Using my emotional guidance system has changed the way I view the world.

Your Emotional Guidance System

In his book “The Heart of the Soul: Emotional Awareness,” Gary Zukav discusses the concept of using emotions for personal growth and decision-making. According to Zukav, emotions are a fundamental aspect of our spiritual and psychological development, acting as indicators that tell us when we are aligned or misaligned with our soul’s path.

Zukav suggests that by paying attention to our emotions, we can gain insights into our deepest intentions and the choices that serve us best. Emotions like joy, contentment, and love indicate that we are on the right path, aligning with our true self and purpose. Conversely, emotions such as fear, anger, or sadness signal that there are areas of our life that may require attention, healing, or transformation.

He emphasizes the importance of becoming conscious of our emotions and learning to interpret them correctly as messages that can guide us towards more fulfilling and spiritually aligned lives. By doing so, we not only improve our emotional health but also our overall well-being and spiritual growth.

Your Higher Self And Your Emotional Guidance System

Once I had absorbed this and began using emotions for personal growth, I discovered that negative emotions such as fear, sorrow, and guilt for example meant I was looking at situations and people and processing them through the reactionary part of my brain.   When I was feeling positive and hopeful, especially in the face of adversity, I was processing through my pre-frontal cortex, the seat of my higher self.

Positive Emotions Align With Our Higher Self

The concept of using emotions for personal growth helps us to choose actions that align with our higher self.  When emotions are viewed as a learning aid, our emotional guidance system helps us differentiate between emotions that elevate our spiritual growth (positive emotions) and those that may hinder it (negative emotions). Positive emotions, such as joy, love, and peace, indicate alignment with our higher self. These emotions suggest that our actions and thoughts are in harmony with our deepest values and spiritual objectives, leading to a sense of fulfilment and authenticity.

Negative Emotions Align With Our Ego

Conversely, negative emotions like fear, anger, and jealousy serve as signals that we are potentially out of alignment with our higher self. Rather than dismissing these emotions or attributing them as an effect of someone else’s actions or situations that we encounter.  our guidance system encourages us to see them as important indicators. They point to areas in our lives that may require attention, introspection, or change. For instance, persistent feelings of discontent might suggest that it’s time to reconsider our current path or relationships, or perhaps to heal past traumas that are influencing our present emotions.

The emotional guidance system, therefore, is not just about recognising emotions but also about understanding their origins and what they signify about our psychological and spiritual state. By becoming more attuned to this system, we can make more informed decisions that resonate with our true selves, ultimately fostering personal growth and spiritual evolution.

Giving Up The Old Paradigm

Following the guidance of one’s higher self and using emotions as a navigation tool, requires giving up certain behaviours and mindsets that can hinder personal growth and spiritual alignment. One of the hardest concepts to accept is that we are responsible for our own emotions.  We live in a world where we are taught to make others responsible for how we interpret situations and therefore how we are feeling, but we always have a choice.

I have to stress that this work is often not easy.  It is challenging to change the way we look at things, and it can be painful because we have been taught to react in a certain way.  We must not turn inwards with blame or criticism, whichever way we look at our emotions.  I have in the past blamed others for my pain and sorrow.  Now I know that my pain and sorrow came from the interpretation I had adopted.

Here are six things that someone striving to follow their higher self would need to give up:

1. Blame

Assigning responsibility for one’s emotions or circumstances to others prevents personal accountability and growth. Giving up blame involves acknowledging one’s role in their experiences and responses, fostering a sense of empowerment and self-responsibility.

2. Judgment

Critical judgments of others or oneself can be limiting and create emotional barriers. Letting go of judgment allows for a more compassionate and open-hearted approach to life, encouraging deeper connections and understanding.

3. Control

Attempting to control outcomes, people, or situations can stem from fear and insecurity. Releasing the need for control and embracing trust and acceptance can lead to greater peace and adaptability to life’s fluctuations.

4. Defensiveness

Protecting oneself from perceived threats by being defensive can block genuine interactions and learning. By giving up defensiveness, one becomes more open to feedback, different perspectives, and deeper self-awareness.

5. Victimhood

Viewing oneself as a victim in life scenarios can impede proactive change and personal empowerment. Overcoming a victim mentality involves recognising one’s power to change circumstances and responding to challenges with resilience.

6. Resistance to Change

Resistance can manifest as a refusal to accept new ideas or to adapt to changes that may lead to growth. Surrendering this resistance allows for embracing new opportunities and the potential for transformation.

By giving up these behaviours and attitudes, individuals can better align with their higher self, making choices that are guided by wisdom and emotional awareness rather than fear or habit. This shift promotes a life led by authenticity and conscious choice.

Choosing Hope over Adversity

In her book “The Choice: Embrace the Possible,” Dr. Edith Eva Eger, a psychologist and Holocaust survivor, shares her profound journey of survival, healing, and empowerment. Eger’s story is a compelling testament to the power of the human spirit to overcome unimaginable horrors through the use of what can be understood as an emotional guidance system.

Throughout the narrative, Eger describes how she navigated the extreme conditions of the Auschwitz concentration camp and later, her life post-liberation, by tuning into her internal emotional landscape. Her emotional guidance system played a critical role in her survival and healing process in several key ways:

1. Finding Meaning in Suffering

Eger turned to her internal world to find meaning and purpose, even in the darkest times. Inspired by the work of Viktor Frankl, she focused on what she could control—her responses and her ability to find meaning in suffering. This mindset helped her to not only survive the horrors but also begin the process of healing.

2. Choosing Hope and Compassion

Even in Auschwitz, Eger made a conscious choice to maintain hope and compassion. She shares instances where she chose to dance before an audience of SS officers, finding a way to escape psychologically by imagining herself as a ballerina performing on stage rather than a prisoner dancing for her life. This mental shift allowed her to use her emotions as a source of strength rather than despair.

3. Acknowledging and Processing Trauma

After the war, Eger’s journey of healing involved acknowledging the deep trauma she had endured. She used her emotional reactions as signals to address and work through her past. Her emotions guided her through the healing process, telling her when she needed to confront painful memories and when she needed to seek closure.

4. Transforming Victimhood into Empowerment

Eger’s emotional guidance system helped her to shift from seeing herself as a victim of her circumstances to recognising her agency and capacity for change. She emphasises the importance of not just surviving but choosing to live with passion and purpose.

5. Using Pain as a Guide for Growth

Eger speaks about not letting her pain be in vain. She listens to her emotional pain, learns from it, and uses it to fuel her commitment to helping others. Her work as a therapist is driven by her own experiences and emotional insights, which guide her in assisting others through their healing journeys.

6. Forgiveness

A pivotal part of her emotional and psychological healing involved learning to forgive—both others and herself. Eger discusses how forgiveness was a choice that freed her from the shackles of the past, allowing her to live fully in the present and embrace the future.

Dr. Edith Eva Eger’s use of her emotional guidance system is a powerful example of how deeply understanding and harnessing one’s emotions can lead to extraordinary resilience and transformation. Her life and work demonstrate how facing and processing our deepest emotions can guide us toward healing and profound personal growth.

Emotional Healing And Your Emotional Guidance System

Emotional healing, particularly in the context of conditions like depression or stress, often involves therapies that aim to elevate individuals into a higher self thought system. A state where they are more aligned with their values, capable of experiencing positive emotions, and better able to engage in healthy relationships and behaviours. Various therapeutic approaches help achieve this by changing maladaptive thinking patterns, enhancing emotional awareness, and improving interpersonal dynamics.

Here’s a brief overview of how three well-known therapies work using emotions for personal growth.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

CBT focuses on identifying and changing negative thought patterns and maladaptive behaviours. By challenging these thoughts and replacing them with more balanced and constructive ones, individuals can reduce emotional distress and develop more effective coping strategies. This process helps elevate individuals to a higher self by fostering a more positive and realistic thought system. In effect, the therapy acknowledges that our thought system and interpretation of our thoughts cause us to have a negative emotional reaction.  The healing is achieved by switching from our reactionary brain to our higher self.

Transactional Analysis (TA)

TA is centred on understanding and changing social transactions and relationships. It explores ego states (Parent, Adult, Child) to improve communication and personal awareness. By analysing these transactions, individuals can break free from unhelpful scripts and patterns from their past, enabling them to act more authentically and responsibly in the present. Like CBT, this therapy is about taking responsibility for thinking and interpreting events and changing how we look at things to find relief and healing.

Gestalt Therapy

Gestalt Therapy emphasises awareness, freedom, and self-direction. It focuses on the present moment and encourages individuals to experience their feelings and thoughts fully without judgment. This heightened self-awareness helps individuals resolve unfinished business and integrate conflicting parts of their personality, leading to a more unified and authentic self. Experiencing our emotions helps us identify faulty thinking and interpretation, again to hopefully see things through higher self-thinking.

Using Emotions For Personal Growth And Leadership

Using emotions for personal growth can significantly enhance a leader’s effectiveness in the workplace. There are innumerable benefits and advantages to helping improve personal relationships and teamwork when leaders use their emotional guidance system.  Here are three extremely common ways that emotional awareness and regulation can improve leadership and the positive impact this can have on team dynamics and performance

1. Enhanced Decision-Making

Imagine a leader facing a crucial decision regarding the direction of a project that is lagging. Initially, they might feel frustration and anxiety, urging them to make quick changes to get back on track. However, by using emotions for personal growth, the leader realises these feelings might be clouding their judgment. Instead of acting on impulse, they take a moment to calm their nerves and consult with their team. This deliberative approach allows them to gather more information and weigh the long-term implications of their choices. By handling the situation this way, the team’s morale and trust in leadership are boosted. Team members feel valued and more involved, increasing their motivation and commitment to the project.

2. Conflict Resolution

Consider another scenario where conflicts arise between two departments over resources. The leader might initially feel irritated and pressured to take sides, potentially swaying their decision based on personal biases. Recognizing these feelings as part of using emotions for personal growth, the leader understands that these emotions could lead to unfair decisions. Instead, they facilitate a mediated discussion, allowing both parties to voice their concerns and needs openly. This approach not only resolves the conflict more equitably but also fosters a culture of respect and open communication. It shows the team that problems can be addressed constructively, enhancing collaboration across departments.

3. Promoting a Positive Work Environment

During periods of high stress and looming deadlines, it’s common for team morale to decline. In these situations, leaders themselves can feel overwhelmed. By using emotions for personal growth, a leader can identify these trends. They are not just stressors but opportunities for positive change. Recognising the need for proactive engagement, the leader addresses the team’s morale. They organise a meeting to discuss everyone’s stress and strategies for managing it. They acknowledge the hard work of the team, possibly adjusting deadlines or priorities to relieve pressure. This approach significantly lifts the team’s spirits, reduces burnout, and shows that the leader cares about the team’s well-being, not just the outcomes. As a result, the workplace becomes more positive, with increased productivity and loyalty among team members.

In each of these scenarios, the leader uses their emotional reactions as a compass rather than a map, guiding them through challenging situations with wisdom and empathy. This effective use of emotions for personal growth not only resolves immediate issues but also builds a stronger, more resilient team.